Tripp Atkinson

The Most Important Person You Lead

April 9, 2019 by Tripp Atkinson

“You are the most important person you lead today.”

That can’t be true, can it? It sounds a bit selfish, maybe even arrogant. Certainly I’m not more important than my kids, or my spouse, or the ministry I lead. I may be the leader of a team, but I’m called to humbly serve that team. After all, isn’t servant leadership about making yourself the least important person in the room?

Jesus Christ was the ultimate servant leader. But Jesus also demonstrated an important principle… I must lead myself well if I’m going to serve others well.

I must lead myself well if I’m going to serve others well.

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Jesus’ Model for Self-Care

Commissioned with the most important mission and ministry in history, Jesus was certainly driven and busy. But even with people pressing to get to him with needs, Jesus repeatedly took time to withdraw from the crowds.

He withdrew to pray (Mark 1:35, Mark 6:46, Luke 5:16, Luke 6:12-13).
He withdrew to rest (Mark 6:31-32, Mark 4:35-39).
He withdrew to spend time with his disciples (Mark 3:7, Mark 3:13).
He withdrew to be alone (Matthew 14:13, John 7:10).

Jesus was divine, yet he was also human and had legitimate human needs. Though completely dependent on his divine nature to lead and empower his earthly ministry, he cared for the physical realm through which that power and ministry flowed.

After ministering to the crowds, Jesus made a practice of withdrawing and refueling before he poured himself out again. Jesus practiced and modeled good self-care. He didn’t hide his physical or emotional needs, but asked his friends for support. While Jesus’ life certainly involved rigorous service, sacrifice, and suffering, it also involved self-investment and self-care. By making it a practice to invest in himself, he was better able to humanly care for those whom he was called to lead.

The most important person you lead really is yourself. Through investment in yourself, you are able to best lead others. A spiritually, mentally, physically, and emotionally healthy you honors God and best fulfills the incredible calling God has entrusted to you.

Consider those in your life you would think of more highly than yourself. Don’t you want the best for them? Don’t they deserve the best you?

Lead them well by leading yourself well today.

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly. – Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)

Good self-care begins with self-awareness of your comprehensive health.

All of You: Why Your Comprehensive Health Matters

You matter to God.

In fact, every domain and aspect of your life matters to God.

The apostle Paul notes God’s holistic concern in 1 Thessalonians 5:23-24:

Now may the God of peace make you holy in every way, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless until our Lord Jesus Christ comes again. God will make this happen, for he who calls you is faithful.

God wants to impact every area of our lives, and he wants us to use every area of our lives to love and glorify him. When questioned about which commandment is greatest, Jesus responded,

The most important commandment is this: “…you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.” The second is equally important: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” No other commandment is greater than these. – Mark 12:29-31

God loves all of you, and he want you to love and honor him with all of you.

Comprehensive health matters because we are to love and honor God in every aspect of our being, relating, and doing.

What is comprehensive health?

Comprehensive health, or holistic health, refers to one’s wellness in each area, or “domain,” of life.

While there are several popular models used to divide life into domains, I find the model developed by Michael Hyatt to be most helpful. Hyatt identifies ten interrelated life domains, grouped together into larger domains of “Being,” “Relating,” and “Doing,” as follows:

BEING
– Spiritual: Your connection with God
– Intellectual: Your engagement with significant ideas
– Emotional: Your psychological health
– Physical: Your bodily health

RELATING
– Marital: Your spouse or significant other
– Parental: Your children if you have any
– Social: Your friends & associates

DOING
– Vocational: Your profession
– Avocational: Your hobbies & pastimes
– Financial: Your personal or family finances

Hyatt stresses the interconnected nature of each domain. For example, job stress can impact our physical and emotional well-being, strain our family relationships, and isolate us from friendships. Lack of health in one domain can quickly erode well-being in a number of other domains.

Because of the interconnected nature of each domain, it’s imperative to understand each domain and constantly assess our health in each area.

Your comprehensive health matters because…

1) It honors God.

Simply put, we were created to honor and glorify God (Isaiah 43:7, Romans 11:36, Colossians 1:15-20). 1 Corinthians 10:31 reminds us, “whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.”

Comprehensive health is really a matter of stewardship. The apostle Paul reminds us that we do not belong to ourselves. Everything we have, even our own bodies, were given to us by God and belong to God.

Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body. – 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

How we use our bodies, minds, talents, and resources is all a matter of stewardship. As we are good stewards of each domain, we honor God.

2) It impacts your witness.

In his final moments on earth, Jesus reminds his followers of their mission: “…And you will be my witnesses, telling people about me everywhere…” (Acts 1:8). We are to be witnesses for Christ, not only in word, but in example. In the Great Commission (Matthew 28:18-20), Jesus clarifies that part of that mission is to “Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you.” If we are to teach everything Jesus commanded, that includes teaching on finances (Luke 10:29-37, Romans 13:6-8), marriage (Matthew 19:4-6), friendship (John 15:12-17), and rest (Matthew 11:28-30).

Jesus had much to say about being, relating, and doing.

Ultimately, our lives are to be a reflection to the world of what Jesus thinks about identity, relationships, and how to experience abundant life in him. All of this points to the most important message at the heart of our calling:

So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, “Come back to God!” – 2 Corinthians 5:20

3) It impacts your service.

Ephesians 2:10 reminds us: “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” There is no doubt that we were created with purpose to honor and serve God well. Our health in each domain impacts the quality and longevity of our service. For example:

Spiritual health leads to an awareness of the leading of the Spirit of God and the bearing of spiritual fruit.
Emotional health leads to greater emotional intelligence (an awareness of our emotions and those of others) with which we can better empathize and care.
Physical health leads to wellness and more energy to serve well.
Financial health paves the way for increased generosity to meet needs.

Because the health of each domain impacts the others, if we desire to serve well we need to be intentional about each aspect of our health. Comprehensive health is a big deal because it impacts how we honor, represent, and serve God.

Comprehensive health is a big deal because it impacts how we honor, represent, & serve God.

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It is at the heart of the Great Commandment to love God with everything we have. What greater motivation is there to get moving on the path to holistic health?

Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well. – 3 John 1:2

I want to help and encourage you in your journey to comprehensive health. Click the image below to check out a resource that can help you win.

Remember, you are the most important person you lead today. Honor God by leading yourself well!

The Greatest Graduate Gift: The Senior Experience

April 3, 2019 by Tripp Atkinson

The greatest graduate gift a parent and church can give students is a Senior experience that grounds them in their faith and produces an individualized plan to help them experience God’s best in college and beyond.

At Sugar Hill Church, the culmination of our comprehensive spiritual growth plan for students (called Grounded for Life) is the Senior Experience. The Senior Experience serves as a final preparation and launching pad for life beyond high school. Through a co-ed Senior Small group experience, students begin the first semester studying a student version of Financial Peace University (we get the most positive feedback from parents on this), then a study of Revelation (its themes and promises are so appropriate for students preparing for an unknown future).

In their final semester of small group, students are led to write a practical and actual plan for how to succeed beyond high school. We’ve learned that most students don’t plan to fail; most just don’t plan not to. That is why we lead them in writing a plan that is based on our nine Grounded for Life biblical principles.

The Plan

Each student is given a customized Senior Experience journal where students take notes as each biblical principle is taught and Scripture is discussed in smaller groups. They also write down ideas as current college students share their college experience and suggest practical steps to implement the principles in ways that will benefit their life beyond high school. Students develop personal action steps for each biblical principle identified in The Plan, and together as a group the students decide on the most practical and helpful action steps for each principle. At the end of the semester, we take their action steps and have them professionally printed into each class’ unique version of The Plan as a physical reminder to carry with them into their next stage of life. We encourage students to keep The Plan somewhere they will see it often and review the wisdom and ideas they took time to craft into their plan.

The Five

Before students graduate, we also encourage them to identify a circle of five people that can hold them accountable to their plan during their first year of college. A number of studies have shown that students who have accountable relationships with 3-5 adults while in college are significantly more successful at thriving spiritually than those who do not. We suggest their “5” include a parent (or two), a senior adult, a past or current mentor (such as small group leaders), as well as a peer that they admire spiritually. These 5 have the ability to greatly impact and encourage a student’s successful transition to college. We connect these “5” to the student and The Plan at a special celebration.

The Celebration

Another way we celebrate this period of transition is by making a big deal of High School graduation at Sugar Hill Church. We have a special Graduate Recognition Sunday where students are celebrated and encouraged by their church family. As a part of this special day, graduates invite their families, close friends, and their “5” to a banquet where they are further celebrated by our whole Sugar Hill Students team and the rising Senior class. At this banquet, graduates share The Plan booklets with their “5” and begin the process of receiving encouragement to thrive as they enter the post-high-school world. This event puts the exclamation point on our preparation of students to be Grounded For Life!

The Gift

At the banquet, students are presented with special Challenge coins that we have custom minted for each class. Challenge coins are a long-standing tradition in the military that serve as a symbol of identity, a source of pride, and a reminder of the support that one has behind them. We have these special challenge coins minted for our graduating class to serve as a constant reminder of their identity, values, and the army of support they have behind them in their church family. Some students put these where they can see them daily and some say they carry them in their pocket when they are having a tough day.

Through a special Senior Small Group, the writing of The Plan, the formation of their accountability circles, the celebration and commissioning service, the banquet, and a special gift, the Senior Experience serves as not only a celebration, but also a launching pad for high school graduates. By making such a big deal of this important milestone, we encourage families, further tie students to the church, and empower students to be Grounded for Life! We give students a purpose, a plan, and the people to help them live God’s best for their lives…

We think that’s a pretty great graduate gift!

10 Regrets Every Parent Can Avoid

August 15, 2018 by Tripp Atkinson

Parenting is really, really tough. It seems that as soon as you start figuring out a few things, your kids are grown. Because of this, some of the best lessons are found in what others have learned before us along the parenting journey. These lessons are usually conveyed as statements of regret. Having worked with parents of graduates for over 20 years, here are some of the biggest parenting regrets I have heard the most.

1) “I regret not investing more time and energy in things that matter most.”

I typically hear this most right after high school graduation or about a semester into college. Especially when their children begin to struggle, parents ask what can be done to get their children to be committed to Christ and an active part of a supportive church. The problem for many is that they have spent years up until this point making other things a priority in their kid’s lives, and never made time for spiritual development or a commitment to church. I hear so many parents express regret over investing countless weekends and resources in things (ie. travel sports) at the expense of commitment to church.

If we have taught them for years that leisure activities are more important than church, why would they be convinced differently when they get to college or have their own family?

Challenge: Identify what matters most for your family. Once you have identified those values that are most important, let those things drive how you prioritize your time and resources. Talk about family values with your kids and let them in on how priorities drive decisions in your home. Make spiritual development a big deal. Make Jesus the biggest deal. Value family over stuff. Keep the main things, the main things.

Remember, YOU dictate what’s important.

2) “I regret not getting the leash right.”

This one is all about freedom and discipline. If the end goal is to prepare students for responsible independence by the time they graduate, then we have to take a measured approach to freedom and discipline. We (parents) often get this backwards. The least amount of freedom should be given when they are young (think “short leash”), but as they mature, children should be given opportunities to earn more and more freedom. As they fail, we tighten the leash and use discipline and coaching to help them learn and grow. We then give them more freedom and the opportunity to prove their responsible independence.

When parents reach out to me in crisis and let me know that their kid has failed in some area, I often catch them off guard by saying “congratulations!” While I am truly sorry they are in crisis, I want to remind them of the incredible opportunity they have to help their kids fail well. These are learning opportunities that are (hopefully) rare.

Challenge: Give your kids opportunities to fail. I promise, it’s OK. As they do, coach them through it and help them grow. Measured independence and discipline should both be very intentional. Be wise in the dangers you expose your kids to, but realize the very best time in their lives to learn lessons is when they live in such close proximity to loving parents who can help them grow and learn to make wise choices.

Remember, the goal is not raising perfect kids…but prepared kids.

3) “I regret not spending more quality time together.”

Every parent will one day find themselves cleaning out a closet full of broken toys and outdated electronics. While these are all things that were given out of love because their child “needed” them, eventually both children and parents realize these were not the things they needed most from their parents. I have never had a college student tell me that they regret not having more “toys” in high school. But I have had countless tell me that they regret not spending more quality time with their family. While quantity of time is important, it is the quality of time that makes the biggest impact.

I once planned a “Family Game Night” at home as a cheap alternative to taking my kids to an expensive entertainment venue they had been asking about. When I tucked my son in bed that night, I was thinking he was probably disappointed in having to stay home and play games with mom and dad. To my surprise, he gave me the biggest hug and said, “Tonight was the best night EVER!”

Challenge: Don’t buy the lie that you serve your family best by working more hours to buy them more “stuff.” Of course parents love providing nice things for their children, but let’s not lose sight of their deepest needs. Let your calendar reflect an intentionality to capture quality time with your kids.

Remember, the greatest of presents is your presence.

4) “I regret not having meaningful conversation with my kids.”

I’m amazed at the number of parents who feel like they don’t even know the person they drop off at college. In a device-age, families are struggling more and more to actually connect with each other. Many are checking social media to find out what is happening with their kids. While being attune to their social media presence is certainly good, there can be a false sense of “knowing” each other based on snapshots and carefully composed taglines. Meaningful conversation takes time and cuts beyond what they do to who they are.

Challenge: Create time and space for communication in your home. There are two environments that tend to encourage meaningful conversation in the home.

#1 Dinner Table – Reclaim the dinner table as a sacred place for intentional conversation. This starts with banning devices (absurd, I know) and asking open ended questions. (“What is one good thing and one bad thing that happened today?”)
#2 Bedside – When children are babies, parents tend to spend a ton of time by their beds talking, telling stories, and praying together. Too many stop doing this as their children get older. Commit individual time with each child each night to pray, share stories, and talk about those things that matter most. Steer the conversation towards their greatest needs. (unconditional love, acceptance & value, and significance & purpose)

Remember, at their core, children want to be known. Do the hard work of making that happen.

5) “I regret not parenting my kids as individuals.”

Great teachers and coaches know that you can run a classroom or program with defined culture and set rules, but you must teach and coach students as individuals. This concept is especially true in parenting. One-size-fits-all may work for some things, but not parenting. Each child is wonderfully complex, and truly one of a kind. While there are certain needs that every child shares, each child has their own personality, temperament, learning style, giftedness, and unique needs. To lead them and grow them, you must understand and play to those differences.

Challenge: The more you know your child, the more you understand what it takes to motivate, challenge, encourage, discipline, and coach them. Don’t get lazy by failing to parent your children as individuals. Don’t get hung up on it being “unfair” to use different parenting strategies for each kid. If the goal of parenting is to best prepare your children, use those techniques and strategies that best capture their individual heart and play to their unique originality.

Remember, one size does not fit all in parenting.

6) “I regret trying to be a friend, when they needed a parent.”

It’s a shame that our kids do not realize just how cool we actually are. Because they (especially teens) struggle to see this, some parents go to great lengths to prove this to them. The temptation in this is to take on the role of their friend, and abandon the role of a parent. While your kids will have opportunity to have a lot of friends, they only have one opportunity to experience what you uniquely offer them as a parent.

Challenge: Parent them while you still have that opportunity. When your children are grown, you will have a chance to be their friend. Use this limited time in their lives to lead, love, correct, coach, and disciple…as a parent. Embrace your unique role in your child’s life. Don’t surrender the blessing of parenthood for a lesser role.

Remember, the most significant role you can have in your child’s life is PARENT.

7) “I regret conforming to what other parents are doing.”

Peer pressure is real in parenting, especially when coupled with the constant overture from your kids “but every other parent is doing it!” When faced with difficult decisions, it is certainly easy to look around and survey popular opinion. While a “go with the flow” approach to parenting may be easier in the moment, it certainly does not give you the best long term returns.

Challenge: You are accountable for what God has entrusted to you. When faced with difficult parenting decisions, do the work of praying through the decision, searching biblical wisdom, and seeking Godly wisdom from trusted sources. Ultimately, you must parent based on what is best for your child and what supports your parenting aim.

Remember, Godly counsel is infinitely more reliable than popular opinion.

8) “I regret being a manager and not a leader.”

Sometimes being a parent feels like you’re a scheduler, an Uber driver, an air traffic controller and a personal shopper all in one. There are days where the objective may just be to manage the chaos, get everyone where they need to be, not kill anybody, and let’s just move on to another week! Have you ever just wanted to fast forward through a day, week, season, or school grade? These feelings can be especially common when we (parents) allow ourselves to get in a managerial mindset.

Challenge: Don’t let the craziness of life rob you of the blessing and opportunities of parenting. This is all about perspective. We can either grip the steering wheel and grit our teeth as we drive to ONE MORE practice or event in rush hour traffic, or we can see that 30 minutes in the car as an opportunity to invest in our kids. We can turn the radio up and sing our guts out, roll down the windows (although not while singing, or our kids will hide), or talk to them about what their sport is teaching them. Those times of managing that crazy schedule can actually be some of the most valuable teaching moments and times of discipleship your family will ever have. We are parents, teachers, and spiritual leaders. Let’s redeem every opportunity to lead.

Remember, everything on your schedule provides an opportunity to lead.

9) “I regret not helping my child own their faith.”

I see so many students who go off to college and spiritually crash the first time Professor Wine & Cheese challenges their faith. When they are told that their faith is a crutch, their parents are wrong, and that Christianity is for those who are weak-minded, so many students don’t even know how to respond. The absolute best thing we can do for our children is to help them own their faith in Christ. This involves not only leading them to know truth, but helping them understand why it is true.

Challenge: Put in the work to help your children know what they believe, and why they believe it. Help them discover, and allow them to question. Don’t freak out if they have doubts or ask tough questions. Now is the best possible time for them to explore their faith and “work out” what is true. So many parents don’t encourage this because they fear their kids may ask them questions they don’t know the answer to. One of the most powerful things you can say to your child is “I don’t know, but it is important enough to me that I will help you find the answer.” The most important legacy you can give your child is well tested truth. How are you helping them own their faith?

Remember, your children cannot live off of your faith.

10) “I regret not having a plan.”

We have a plan for a lot of things in our homes… a financial plan, a retirement plan, a meal plan, a plan for extra-curricular activities. All of these plans are important because we know that “If we fail to plan, we plan to fail.” But what about a parenting plan? Do we have an actual plan for how we are going to avoid the types of regrets mentioned above, or do we plan to make it up as we go?

Having a plan is so important, it is a HUGE part of what I do in ministry to students and families through our Grounded for Life spiritual growth plan. In fact, before students graduate from Student Ministries, we lead each student through a process of writing an ACTUAL PLAN of how they are going to experience God’s best for their lives beyond graduation by living out the truth of God’s Word. (For more info on Grounded for Life, click here.) Putting a plan on paper has proven to be so much more effective than simply graduating with good intentions.

Challenge: Don’t overcomplicate this, and don’t put this off. Write down those things that matter most to you as a parent. Use these statements of regret from other parents as a guide to create intentionality in each of these areas. Once you’ve identified those things that matter most, tweak your schedule, budget, and boundaries for your home to reflect what you really want for your family. Share these things with your kids and share them with friends and family who can offer you encouragement in these areas. As you invest time in this, be encouraged that you are doing work that will shape the lives and futures of your kids, and grandkids.

Remember, most parents do not plan to have regrets; they just don’t plan NOT to.

Grandparents

This is an important reminder for grandparents as well. One of the blessings of being a grandparent is you get a “do-over” of sorts with those regrets you may hold on to from parenting. You get to take all the lessons you learned as a parent and pass them on to your children as they navigate the same unknowns, fears, and trials of parenting their kids.

You get to have a unique and powerful voice in the lives of your grandchildren. Embrace your special role as a grandparent, and continue your ministry of building a legacy of faith that will impact generations to come.

If these thoughts were helpful at all, please feel free to share them as an encouragement to another parent. If you want to be notified of future parenting articles and helps, you can subscribe by scrolling up, dropping your email, and hitting “subscribe.” For more information on how I can partner with you and your family, check out www.sugarhillstudents.com.

For more parenting resources from this series, check out sugarhill.church/becoming.

7 Questions to Ask Before Dating

March 6, 2018 by Tripp Atkinson

Wk 2 from High School series “Status” at Sugar Hill Church. For more information on how your Middle or High School student can be a part of teaching series like these with hundreds of other students, check out www.SugarHillStudents.com.

When students ask if a dating relationship is a good idea, my answer is always the same. “It depends.” I’ve seen some high school relationships handled extremely well, and they have proved to be mutually encouraging and beneficial. I have seen other high school relationships (OK, most of them) that end in heartache, regret, and ruined friendships. Much of this pain and regret can be avoided by taking the time to wisely and honestly answer a few questions on the front end.

“Enthusiasm without knowledge is no good; haste makes mistakes.” – Proverbs 19:2

Here are seven questions to ask to determine if a relationship is a good idea…

7 Questions to ask before dating…

1) Am I being led by the Lord?

You may have talked to a best friend or sibling about it, but have you talked to God about it? James 1:5 states, “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.”

God also leads us through the power of his Word (Psalm 119:105), the prompting of his Spirit (John 14:26), and the counsel of wise mentors (Proverbs 19:20).

The best advice I ever heard on discerning the will of God was this: “Walk with God, and he will never lead you out of his will.” God wants the very best for you…allow him to lead you to it!

2) Are my parents supportive of this?

I know, I know. Your parents know nothing of this dating thing. It’s a brand new concept that’s only been around a few years. And besides, they want you to be miserable, right?! While some students actually think this, there comes a time for virtually every student (typically a couple of years into college) when you will realize the wisdom and value of parents. I have seen many, many students determined to be in a relationship against their parents’ wishes, only to have major regret later.

If you are in high school, here is the bottom line: while the Bible does not specifically call you to be in a dating relationship in high school, the Bible does clearly command you to honor your parents.

“Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” – Exodus 20:12

If it is God’s will for you to ultimately be with someone, it will still be his will when you graduate high school. Honor your parents. It is not worth ruining your life-long relationship with your parents for the less-than-2% chance you may end up marrying your high school crush.

3) Do I know why I am dating?

There are two questions that will help you clarify this.

– What is the purpose of dating? Serious question.
– Why do I want to date this person? This answer will reveal a lot.

Write your answers to these questions on paper. Seeing it can bring good perspective. (You may also want to bring these answers to the conversation with you parents about dating.)

4) Am I fulfilled apart from the relationship?

God did not create Eve to complete Adam…or the other way around. He created them to help each other. (Genesis 2:18) While God certainly does use us in each other’s lives, God never intended for others to be the primary object of our fulfillment. No guy or girl will ever be able to save you from loneliness, depression, or insecurity. God didn’t create them to do that. God created you to seek him first (Matthew 6:33), and to be in a relationship with him before you seek fulfillment in anyone else.

We can only experience fulfillment in a love relationship with Christ. In such a relationship, we begin to realize our true identity in Christ, and can begin to embrace our unique design. As we do this, we can experience authentic relationships as a part of the body of Christ.

From lonely to fulfilled graphic. Tripp Atkinson

Moving from lonely to fulfilled.

(For more info on how you can find fulfillment in Christ, check out this article: “From Lonely to Fulfilled…“)

5) Are we going to help each other seek fulfillment in Christ?

Consider each aspect of the graphic above. Is this person going to encourage you in these areas?

Here is some Scripture to consider:

2 Corinthians 6:14, “Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness?” Is this person a follower of Christ who is growing in their love relationship with him?

1 Corinthians 15:33, “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.'” I’ve heard many students state that God could use them in a dating relationship to change someone. While God certainly can use us in the lives of others, this is a VERY unwise approach to dating.

2 Timothy 2:22, “Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.” So much heartache could be avoided by rightly discerning the motives of the heart.

So if you are convinced that the other person will encourage you in each of these areas, then will you honestly do the same?

6) Am I ready to date?

You probably already know the answer to this. Based on your circumstances, maturity, season of life, spiritual condition, and other priorities, are you even ready to date? Many students feel pressure to date or date out of a fear of missing an opportunity. Don’t buy the lies. What is the wise thing to do?

7) If this relationship does not lead to marriage, how do we want it to end?

I can guarantee you that VERY FEW students ask this question before they get in a relationship, but most wish they had after the relationship ends. The reality is the overwhelming majority of high school relationships do not lead to marriage (over 98% is what I’ve read a number of places). I know it sounds depressing to consider how a relationship would end before it even gets started, but such careful consideration could completely change how you view dating.

How many people do you know who were good friends before they started dating, and then their friendship was completely ruined by how the relationship was handled? Yeah, me too.

Have a plan to avoid this as much as possible. Answer the tough questions.

Here are 4 Practical Tips for Dating:

1. Build a great friendship before a serious relationship.
2. Seek wise counsel.
3. Set up clear boundaries and don’t ever cross those lines; you can never go back once you have. (And things can quickly go downhill from there.)
4. Keep Christ at the center of everything you do.

And Always Remember This:

Psalm 37:3-4, “Trust in the Lord and do good…Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires.”

God wants the best for you…don’t be afraid to wait for it!!

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From Lonely to Fulfilled…

March 6, 2018 by Tripp Atkinson

Wk 1 from High School series “Status” at Sugar Hill Church. For more information on how your Middle or High School student can be a part of teaching series like these with hundreds of other students, check out www.SugarHillStudents.com.

Want to change your status from LONELY to FULFILLED? Know that you are not alone and there is good news! While people often turn to destructive behavior (relationally & sexually) in the name of “love,” there is a love that can truly satisfy…you just have to look in the right place.

The problem

Having worked with students for over 20 years, I have seen a TON of heartache, regret, and shame as a result of destructive behavior (relationally & sexually) in the name of “love.” [DISCLAIMER: Students, this is true of us adults too!] Sometimes the very thing that we think will fulfill or satisfy, is that thing that leaves us feeling alone. If we look to people (or romance) to fulfill us, we will always have a problem when the flowers die.

The root of the problem

At the root of so many poor decisions is the the feeling of being “lonely.” The perception of loneliness has nothing to do with one’s social status or how many “friends” or followers one has. In fact, some of the loneliest people may be those surrounded by the largest crowds. Out of a feeling or perception of alone-ness, students (and adults, too) go to great lengths in search of fulfillment. Unfortunately, looking for fulfillment in a person or relationship can often compound the problem. Let’s take a look at the root of loneliness and explore how true fulfillment is found.

Reasons teens feel lonely

Here are just a few of the reasons I hear students say they feel alone.

Family problems (maybe the most painful)
“I don’t have any real friends.”
“I don’t feel accepted.”
“I’m not understood.”
“I’m not satisfied with my life.”
“I don’t like myself, so I think others don’t like me.”
“I can’t live up to the expectations of others.”
“Because of what I’ve done, no one can love me.”
“I have been told I’m… (worthless, ugly, ordinary, trash, etc.)”

The reality of feeling “lonely”

The root of our craving to not be alone is a God-given desire. In fact, loneliness is the first thing in Scripture that God said was not good (Genesis 2:18). God created us to live in community, both with him and with others. Like every God-given longing, he has a purpose and a plan in which to fully satisfy that desire. As with all things that God designed, we can choose to look to the creator of these longings to satisfy them, or we can choose to chase cheap imitations that can never satisfy and will ultimately leave us unfulfilled and feeling even more lonely.

The solution

Throughout Scripture, we see Jesus loving the lonely and confronting those things that they seek that leaves them empty. (Some great examples of this: John 4 – Woman at the well; John 5:1-9 – Jesus heals a lame man.)

So what is the solution for loneliness? How can one experience true fulfillment? There are four important aspects:

From lonely to fulfilled.

1) Experience a love relationship with Christ. (Status: Loved)

God created mankind to be completely fulfilled in relationship with him. In the Garden of Eden, man and woman experienced harmony & fulfillment with God as well as harmony & fulfillment in relationship with each other through him. Sin changed everything.

Immediately, the loneliness of sin became clear. After mankind disobeyed God, we see that God went “searching” for man. Genesis 3:9, “Then the Lord God called to the man, Where are you?’” Although God obviously knew where he was, we see that man was hiding from God. Sin broke fellowship in the Garden, and sin still breaks fellowship today. The loneliness of sin is real.

The only cure for the loneliness of sin is the love of a Savior. “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.” (Romans 5:8) Through faith in the work of Christ on the cross, we can receive forgiveness of sin, experience abundant (& eternal life), and be fulfilled through a love relationship with him. (To learn more about how to have a love relationship with Christ, click here.)

As you experience the ultimate love of Christ (1 John 4:8), you can change your status from lonely to loved.

2) Realize your identity in Christ. (Status: Valued)

As you experience a love relationship with Christ, you can begin to more fully understand your identity in him. You can know the basis for who you really are as described in Scripture. You can know:

Psalm 139:1	I am personally known by God.
Psalm 139:13-14	I am fearfully, wonderfully, and personally made by God.
Psalm 139:16	I am the object of God’s planning and will.
Zephaniah 3:17	I am the delight of God.
Romans 5:1	I am made right with God and at peace with him.
Romans 5:8	I am so incredibly loved. Even while I was a sinner, Christ died in my place.
Romans 6:6	I am set free from the power of sin.
Romans 8:1	I am forgiven, and not condemned!
Romans 8:15	I am personally loved and adopted as God’s dear child.
Romans 8:38-39	I am absolutely secure in God’s love through Christ. Nothing can separate me from his never-ending love.
Romans 12:4-5	I am an invaluable part of the Body of Christ.
1 Corinthians 12:18	I am uniquely made and gifted with purpose.
2 Corinthians 5:20	I am blessed with every spiritual blessing in Christ.
Ephesians 1:3	I am an heir of God according to his will.
Ephesians 1:11	I am God’s masterpiece!
Ephesians 2:10	I am equipped to make a difference in his kingdom.
Titus 3:7	I am eternally alive in him.

Who you are does not depend on what you do. Identity does not depend on titles, or positions, or social status. It depends on the wonderful fact that you are a child of God. You are God’s masterpiece, and you are valued and treasured simply for who you are.

As you realize your identity in Christ, you can change your status from lonely to valued.

3) Embrace your unique design. (Status: Content)

Understanding real love in Christ and your immeasurable value in him, you can begin to embrace and love your unique design.

The Apostle Paul reminds us of the importance of our unique design in Romans 12:4-6. He tells us, “Just as our bodies have many parts and each part has a special function, so it is with Christ’s body. We are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other. In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.”

You are no accident and God has made you one-of-a-kind for a reason. All of your personality, passions, talents, and giftedness is what makes you YOU. And that is exactly what makes you an invaluable part of the body of Christ.

Embrace this! See the beauty of your unique design. Don’t waste your time wishing to be what someone else is. This only robs the body of Christ from the gift of YOU. Embrace and love your unique design.

Don’t waste your time wishing to be what someone else is. This only robs the body of Christ from the gift of YOU. #embrace

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As you do, you can change your status from lonely to content.

4) Pursue Authentic Community. (Status: Known)

We were created to live in community. Throughout Scripture, we see that community is a big deal. The Bible makes it clear that “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)

Community is modeled for us in the Bible. Acts 2:42-47 is a beautiful description of what community looks like in the early church,

All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity— all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.

The Bible is clear as to the benefits of community and how we should live in community with one another.

Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”

1 Thessalonians 5:11, “So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.”

Romans 15:7, “Therefore, accept each other just as Christ has accepted you so that God will be given glory.”

Live in the reality of all God wants you to experience in authentic community. As you pursue authentic community, you can change your status from lonely to known.

Status: Fulfilled!

Biblical community is the context for spiritual formation, through which God makes us more like Christ. As we grow more in our love relationship with Christ, we more fully realize our value and can more fully embrace our unique design. In doing this, we can more rightly use our giftedness in the context of biblical community, and we discover each of these elements working together to lead us to a place that is the complete opposite of unfulfilled loneliness…that is complete fulfillment!

Don’t miss this… Through a love relationship with Jesus Christ, you can experience true love, realize & embrace your unique identity in him, and live in authentic community with others. All of these truly lead to a status of “fulfillment” in your life.

In Christ alone can you change your status from LONELY to FULFILLED!

In Christ alone can you change your status from lonely to fulfilled. #status

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Take it home…

If you were completely honest with yourself:

– Do you experience feelings of loneliness?
– What destructive behavior in your life is a result of coping with aloneness?
– What truth most resonates with you from the points above?
– Identify one thing you need to do this week to experience true fulfillment, and do it!

Please consider sharing this blog with someone who might need some encouragement in this area.
To subscribe to this blog, simply scroll up & add your email address in the box on the right.

Check Your Pockets

September 27, 2017 by Tripp Atkinson

Students, thanks for hanging with us through these First 30 devotionals for college students. I promise the spiritual investment you make in yourself will pay dividends for years to come. As we wrap up this First 30 series, I pray that the spiritual investment will continue. I pray that college will not be a time to simply survive, but to thrive.

As you face the rest of your first year in college (or work, military, etc.), I hope you never forget three things. These three things are so important, I had them engraved on a challenge coin for each of my graduating students. If you are not familiar with a challenge coin, here is the significance…

Challenge coins are a longstanding tradition in the military that builds camaraderie and signifies a person is a member of a special group. Challenge coins serve as a symbol of identity, a source of pride, and a reminder of the support that one has behind them. We have a special challenge coin minted for our graduating class in hopes they serve as a constant reminder of their identity and values.

Let the features of this coin remind you of:

– Your Identity (Cross):

On the front of the coin is a cross (specifically the one we use in our Sugar Hill Church logo). Let this always remind you to find your identity in Christ & what He has done for you.

I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me. Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, just as the Scriptures said. – 1 Cor. 15:3-4

Jesus really is the BIGGEST DEAL! What he did on the cross and in raising from the grave three days later are the most significant events in all of history. Because of the cross, our sins can be forgiven (Romans 3:23-25), we can be reconciled to God (Romans 4:25), we can experience abundant life (John 10:10), and our eternal home can be heaven (John 14:1-4).

Belief in the events surrounding the cross of Christ is what separates Christianity from every other world religion and faith system. It is not only the cornerstone of our faith, but also of our identity.

Let your identity always be rooted in:

The priceless value God has given you (Psalm 139:13-14, Ephesians 2:10)
How Jesus proved that value on the cross (Romans 5:8)
How you realize that value & purpose in relationship with Christ (1 John 3:1, 2 Corinthians 5:20)

– Your Support (“Welcome Home”):

Next to the cross on the front of the coins there is “Sugar Hill Church – Welcome Home.” We want you to know that no matter how far you may go, you are always “welcome home.” This is always your home & we always have your back. God never intended us to live life alone.

We were created to live in community. Throughout Scripture, we see that community is a big deal. (Genesis 2:18, Proverbs 27:17, Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, Romans 12:4-5,10, Romans 15:7, 1 Thessalonians 5:11)

Community in context of the church is modeled for us in the Bible. Acts 2 describes the early church,

All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. 43 A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. 44 And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. 45 They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. 46 They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity— 47 all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved. – Acts 2:42-47

If you are away for college, we hope and pray you make it a priority to actively be a part of (& serve) a local church that makes the Bible a big deal, Jesus the biggest deal, and serving the way you show the love of Christ to your community. If you are close by, we hope and pray that you actively serve and grow in your faith at Sugar Hill Church.

Whether home or away, know that you will always have a home at Sugar Hill Church. You will always have pastors, mentors, and leaders who love you and want the best for you. We want to be friends and family for life!

– Your Foundation (Grounded for Life – Jeremiah 17:8):

On the back of the coin is a large green tree with the words “Grounded for Life” and the Scripture reference Jeremiah 17:8. This verse speaks about those who put their trust in the Lord –

They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit. – Jer. 17:8

The tree is a picture of the life we want you to live. There will certainly be tough times ahead in life, Jesus even assured his disciples of this (John 16:33). But as you continue to trust in the Lord, you can have a foundation (“roots”) that offer stability in hardship and peace in uncertain times. In fact, even in the toughest days, you can thrive and “never stop producing fruit.”

As you continue to trust in the Lord, & intentionally live according to His Word, you truly can be Grounded for Life; that is, grounded to experience abundant life, and grounded for the duration of your life. You really don’t have to be a statistic of someone who fell away from their faith in college. You can fully enjoy the college experience without the regret, stress and disharmony of an inconsistent or lost faith. God wants the very best for you! This is discovered and lived in consistent relationship with Christ.

Check your pockets…

I encourage you to put your coin where you can see it everyday. Some days, you may need to physically carry it with you, and check your pockets often. (We all have days like that.) Whether you physically carry your coins or not, I pray that they will serve as constant reminders of your faith, family, & friends. Always know that God has got you & we are with you!!!

This devotional is one in Sugar Hill Church’s First 30 devotional series for college students.
To access the podcast of this devotional and the entire series, click here.
To subscribe to this blog, simply scroll up & add your email address in the box on the right.

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Influences

September 23, 2017 by Tripp Atkinson

I read a headline a while back that said “18 year old girl can face manslaughter charge for allegedly encouraging boyfriend’s suicide, judge rules.”

Newsflash: If someone is encouraging you to hurt yourself, IT IS NOT A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP!!!

While I know it is an extreme example, this story illustrates a truth that so many of us experience in our own lives on different levels. I’m talking about allowing voices to influence us that are not speaking truth in love or pointing us to God’s best for our lives. All of us have influences in our lives that give us messages based on lies. While these lies may not lead to our physical death, they may be calling us down paths that lead to pain, regret, and a cheap imitation of God’s best.

A principle we want all students to know is this: Your life will be significantly shaped by your relationships. That’s why I say, “Handle them with care!”

Scripture tells us,

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. – Proverbs 27:17

We all give and receive influence daily. Although we don’t have control over every source of influence in our lives (billboards, etc), we do have control over some of the most significant sources of influence… relationships. (When I say relationships, I mean ALL relationships, friendships, etc.)

Author Max Lucado says this, “Life comes with voices. Voices lead to choices. Choices have consequences.”

How can we evaluate the voices in our lives, and the influence of relationships?

I think there are 3 Key Questions we should ask to evaluate a relationship:

1) Conditional or unconditional?

Is the love experienced in your relationship conditional or unconditional? Ask, “Is this person helping me or using me?”

1 Corinthians 13 describes what love looks like and what love does,

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not
dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts,
always hopes, always perseveres. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

So many relationships are based on “I love you if…” If someone tells you that, it is not unconditional love. According to 1 Corinthians 13, this self-seeking attitude is not love at all.

2) Truth or lie?

Is the relationship based on truth or a lie? How open and honest are you with each other? Do you pretend to be someone you are not just to get the approval of this person?

Authentic, healthy relationships give truth as well as receive truth…even when it hurts.

Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy. – Proverbs 27:6

Think about that. It is better to have a loving friend hurt your feelings with the truth, than have someone “kiss up” with what you want to hear. If you have a friend that loves you enough to be honest with you even when it hurts, you need to cherish and invest in that friendship!

So many relationships are based on lies, and the absence of absolute truth. Don’t be fooled.

3) Best or Imitation?

Does this relationship point me towards God’s best for my life, or a cheap imitation of God’s best?

Is this person experiencing God’s best for their own life?

And you should imitate me, just as I imitate Christ. – 1 Corinthians 11:1

If someone is not living God’s best for their own life, why let them influence yours?

Does this person truly want God’s best for me?

So many relationships point us towards a cheap imitation of God’s best for our lives. Such imitations can never satisfy. Don’t settle for less, when God wants to give you more.

Remember, your life is significantly shaped by your relationships. Understand them and handle with care!

The 140:
Your life is significantly shaped by your relationships. Understand them and handle with care!

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This devotional is one in Sugar Hill Church’s First 30 devotional series for college students.
To access the podcasts of this devotional and the entire series, click here.
To subscribe to this blog, simply scroll up & add your email address in the box on the right.

Boundaries

September 21, 2017 by Tripp Atkinson

The first time anyone ever trusted me to babysit was my sister asking me to watch her first born son, Trey. I was a senior in high school, and spending time with my three-year-old nephew who was like a younger brother to me sounded like fun. I mean, how hard could babysitting really be?

(If you have ever babysat, you know what an awesome responsibility that is. You probably also know that if you are not careful and don’t foresee dangerous situations, things can go terribly wrong. I now know that.)

Outside the lines

I decided that Trey and I would play soccer in the front yard. He just started playing soccer on a team and was trying to learn basic skills and things like how to stay in the boundary lines. “Uncle Tripp” was going to show him a few pointers. Well, Uncle Tripp was no better at soccer than three-year-old Trey, so we found ourselves kicking the ball in the road more times than not. Living at the top of a small hill, the ball would hit the road and quickly head towards a storm drain at the bottom of the hill. Every time we kicked the ball into the road, I would tell Trey to stay put while I raced the ball to the bottom of the hill.

This day was hot and we had both worked up a pretty good sweat kicking (and chasing) this soccer ball. I thought I’d be a good uncle and run into the house to get us something to drink. I gave Trey some boundaries and told not to cross the boundary.

It’s OK to leave a kid in the yard by himself briefly, right? What could possibly happen in just a few brief moments? I gave him boundaries!

I ran up the steps, ran inside the house, and got us something to drink. As I headed back out, I walked by a big picture window in the living room that faced the front yard. Passing this window, I saw that Trey had kicked the ball and it went into the street and started rolling down the hill.

Trey had obviously seen me run across the road and he had seen me chase the ball to the storm drain. To my horror, I saw him take off running into the street to get the ball.

Because of my vantage point in this window looking down, I could not only see Trey running into the road, but I could also see around the curve, and that there was a car coming up the street.

Screaming through the window

In that moment, I freeze. In that moment, I’m looking out at a life that I love even more than my own life. I’m looking out at someone that I would literally give anything for, that I would die for. I see him running into the street and I know that from his vantage point, he couldn’t see down the road. He couldn’t see around the curve. From his vantage point, he couldn’t see the danger that was coming. In that moment, I’m frozen and my worst fears rush to mind.

“He doesn’t even see what’s about to happen.”
“He doesn’t even see that this car’s coming.”
“What if this car doesn’t see him?”
“What if they don’t slow down?”
“How is this going to play out!?”

In that moment, I wasn’t thinking of how upset I was at Trey for crossing the boundary. I was not worried about him getting in trouble for disobeying. All I’m thinking is, “I want the best for him. I would rather it be me in the middle of the road in front of this oncoming car than him. I would do anything if I could just trade places right now with where he is and take whatever it is that’s about to happen.” I began to helplessly scream through the window.

Fortunately, that car saw him and stopped, and he was able to get the ball and everything was okay. But I will never forget that moment when my heart almost stopped. I will never forget looking out that big window and seeing what was about to happen.

Love in boundaries

I think this is a picture of how God reacts to his children.

I think sometimes God looks at us and he says, “Hey, I want the very best for you. Know that I love you and would give anything for you. In fact, I did give everything for you when I came and died for you and I took what you deserved on myself so that you could live.” As we live life, I imagine there are so many times that God sees what is ahead and screams at us like I was screaming through that window to my nephew, “Stop! Don’t do it! Slow down! Think! Look!” I think this is the heart of God as we begin to violate the boundaries he has established for living life well.

I established boundaries for my nephew because I love him. As a parent, I establish boundaries for my kids because I love them. I know what is on the other side of those boundaries because I have a perspective on life that my kids don’t have. The boundaries don’t exist to spoil their fun. The boundaries exist to give them life!

From his vantage point, God can see things we can’t see.

That’s why, in his Word, God gives us instructions on things like sexuality. It’s not because he’s trying to spoil our party or fun. He’s saying, “I see down the road, what this can lead to. I see the consequences of taking something great, and going outside the lines with it. I want the best for you, so stop and look around.” When it comes to relationships, when it comes to how we take care of ourselves, when it comes to how we live our lives, God wants the very, very best for us.

You have an all-loving God that is saying, “My child, I love you. Trust me, put your eyes on me and let me give you my very best for your life.”

Consider the words of the Psalmist in Psalm 84:11,

For the LORD God is our sun and our shield. He gives us grace and glory. The LORD will withhold no good thing from those who do what is right.

Do we trust God to do this as we honor him??

Avoiding chaos

If we didn’t have boundaries in basketball, football, or baseball, how would that work out? It would ruin the game. The boundaries don’t exist to spoil the fun of the game…the boundaries exist so that the game can be played the way it was made to be played. No boundaries lead to chaos. The same is true in life.

King Solomon, the wisest person to ever live said,

“The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and pay the penalty.” – Proverbs 22:3

God is not big on rules; God is big on life. Any boundary he gives is for our good. Remember the words of John 10:10,

The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

Today, evaluate the following:

In what ways are you living outside of God’s boundaries?
Do you trust that God is for you and not against you?
Do you believe that the author of life is the authority on life?

Remember, any boundary God gives is for YOUR GOOD & HIS GLORY because He loves you & wants HIS VERY BEST for you. No one is more for you than God!

The 140:

Any boundary God gives is for YOUR GOOD & HIS GLORY because He loves you & wants HIS VERY BEST for you. No one is more for you than God!

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Today, enjoy the abundant life that is possible through active obedience to the One who loves you enough to give you boundaries.

*For more of Trey’s story, check out this highly emotional clip.

God’s Best

September 16, 2017 by Tripp Atkinson

Here is some good news:
– God loves you and wants the very best for you.
– God wants you discover and live His best.

So how exactly do we go about discovering and living God’s best?

We see some great truths of how to do this in Luke 5:1-11. This story is referred to as “The Great Catch” and is about a fishing trip that changed the course of Peter’s life. In this story there are 3 Defining moments through which Peter discovers and begins to live God’s best.

This story is set on a large lake, referred to as the “Sea of Galilee.”

One day as Jesus was preaching on the shore of the Sea of Galilee, great crowds pressed in on him to listen to the word of God. 2 He noticed two empty boats at the water’s edge, for the fishermen had left them and were washing their nets. 3 Stepping into one of the boats, Jesus asked Simon, its owner, to push it out into the water. So he sat in the boat and taught the crowds from there. 4 When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Now go out where it is deeper, and let down your nets to catch some fish.” – Luke 5:1-4

When Jesus told Peter to “Launch out into the deep and let down your nets,” this made absolutely no sense. We are told that on Sea of Galilee, fishermen would fish at night, in shallow water.

Peter’s responds by informing Jesus ,

Master, we worked hard all last night and didn’t catch a thing.” (vs. 5)

It’s important to note that when Peter referred to Jesus as “Master,” he was using a Greek word (epistates) that was a respectful title to one who is in authority, but not an acknowledgment of diety.

Peter reminds Jesus that he had “worked HARD all night” and hadn’t caught a thing. I imagine he was a little annoyed that a preacher (Jesus) was telling a professional fisherman (Peter) how to fish. But out of respect for Jesus, Peter reluctantly obeys. Peter says,

But if you say so, I’ll let the nets down again. (vs. 5)

As he does this, we see the first defining moment for Peter:

1) He responds in obedience to Jesus.

Look at the result of Peter’s obedience…

And this time their nets were so full of fish they began to tear! 7 A shout for help brought their partners in the other boat, and soon both boats were filled with fish and on the verge of sinking. (vss. 6-7)

Against the backdrop of Peter’s failure, God shows him what can happen as he does it God’s way… two boats filled so full with fish that they begin to sink!

Students, always remember, WHEN GOD DIRECTS OUR WORK, WE SEE RESULTS. God’s words can always be trusted.

We put faith in doctors because of the qualifications associated with their title (“M.D.”) We put faith in pharmacists because of the letters behind their name (Pharm D). Think about this… if you trust a doctor to diagnose a health problem and prescribe you medicine, and you trust that pharmacists to give medicine that will help you and not kill you because of the title associated with their name, how much more can you trust the one who has the title “King of Kings” and “Lord of Lords?” Don’t you think if there is anyone qualified to speak truth into your life, it’s the Creator of life!

If there is anyone qualified to speak truth into your life, it’s the Creator of life!

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That’s why we say “The Bible is a big deal.” It is the Word of God.

Let’s look at what happens next in verses 8-10,

When Simon Peter realized what had happened, he fell to his knees before Jesus and said, “Oh, Lord, please leave me—I’m such a sinful man.” 9 For he was awestruck by the number of fish they had caught, as were the others with him. 10 His partners, James and John, the sons of Zebedee, were also amazed. Jesus replied to Simon, “Don’t be afraid! From now on you’ll be fishing for people!”

The second defining moment for Peter is when:

2) He acknowledges Jesus for who He is.

In verse 8, notice what Peter called Jesus. Previously he had called Him master, clearly a term of respect, but now he calls Jesus LORD. The Greek word translated Lord means “he to whom a person or thing belongs, about which he has power of deciding”. (It comes from the word kuros, which means ‘Supremacy’.)

Peter now sees Jesus for who He is. He realizes that the one who did a miracle in the lake, wants to do a miracle in his heart.

Peter changed his response to Jesus from one of respect to one of Lordship and notice what he does:

Falls At His feet.
He took his eyes off of the blessing to look at the blessor.

In the terror of realizing his sinfulness, Peter wants to get away from the holiness of the Lord, but Jesus wants to draw Peter closer. Jesus says to him, “Don’t be afraid…” (vs. 10) We see here the beauty of repentance; it is the place we exchange our sin for God’s grace. We sometimes view repentance as an ugly thing, when in fact, it is such a beautiful thing. Repentance is responding to an invitation to experience God’s best.

Repentance is responding to an invitation to experience God\’s best.

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Jesus continues,

…from now on you will fish for people.

Jesus not only receives Peter in repentance (draws him close), He tells Peter that he wants to use him as His instrument. Peter’s life is changed when he gets Jesus right. He learns the most important life lesson: It is all about Jesus. This leads to the third defining moment in verse 11,

And as soon as they landed, they left everything and followed Jesus.

3) He drops his net and allows Jesus to direct his life.

This response led Peter to “forsake all” to follow Christ, shifting the view of his future, career, and dreams. He left everything and followed Jesus. He realized that Jesus doesn’t want a place in our hearts or lives, He wants all of it. God doesn’t want us to fit Him into our plans; he wants us to submit our lives to His.

You may have dreams and desires, but God may have something bigger in mind. Jesus took Peter from having an occupation (“to take up space”) to a vocation (“calling”).

Most likely, God doesn’t want to change your dreams, but He may want to give you a different view of it. You see, your calling is to reflect the purposes of God through whatever vehicle He has given you. Because He is God, you can trust Him, and in trusting Him (allowing him to direct your path) you can experience His best for your life.

Before this life-defining fishing trip, Peter would have said that he was a “follower” of Jesus. But it wasn’t until he forsook all (“all in”) that he became a true follower of Christ and became on mission with Christ. When he walked off that beach that day, there was no doubt where he stood in his faith.

Today can be a defining moment in your life as you acknowledge Jesus for who He is and respond in obedience to Him today. You don’t have to “follow” Jesus from afar. You can intimately know Him and receive His best for your life as you allow Him to direct your life.

As we acknowledge Jesus for who He is & respond in obedience to Him, we discover God’s best for our lives. Live his best today!

THE 140:
As we acknowledge Jesus for who He is & respond in obedience to Him, we discover God’s best for our lives.

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6 Vital Small Group Lesson Prep Questions

September 15, 2017 by Tripp Atkinson

What an incredible privilege and responsibility to teach the life-changing truths of Scripture. To offer the best we have as a teacher and avoid the temptation to simply regurgitate (read) curriculum, let’s consider these six important questions we need to answer when preparing to teach:

1) What is the BIBLICAL PRINCIPLE? (Keyword: Preparation)

Everything we teach should bring students back to the Bible. Our stories, opinions, and advice do not have the power to change a student’s life. The Word of God does. (2 Timothy 3:16) That is why we believe the Bible is a BIG DEAL and why we want to graduate students who have biblical principles engrained in their minds and hearts. As you prepare, identify and focus on the biblical principle.

2) What is the TAKEAWAY? (Keyword: Clarification)

It’s important to begin with the end in mind. Once you identify the biblical principle we are trying to communicate, clarify the exact main point we want students to grasp as a result of our time together. With every lesson I teach, I clarify the “140,” that is the point of my lesson in 140 characters or less. Remember, your “takeaway” is not just taught through the lesson, but through the entire small group experience.

3) Why is this IMPORTANT? (Keyword: Persuasion)

Identify the significance of your takeaway. This not only creates a sense of urgency in your approach to lesson prep, but also clarifies how you persuade students of its importance. The WHY always drives the passion and urgency of the WHAT.

4) How do I make this REAL to a child / student? (Keyword: Illustration)

The ability to effectively illustrate a biblical truth in a way that makes it “real” to a student is what moves teachers from being good to GREAT! Object lessons, stories, and illustrations that connect a biblical truth to their world are invaluable to helping students understand and remember truth.

5) What does this mean to ME? (Keyword: Application)

Once you communicate biblical truth in a way that students will understand, the goal is to help them apply this truth to their lives personally. Application of biblical truth is the primary end goal of our teaching. As a teacher, there is nothing more rewarding than seeing your investment pay off when a student applies truth in their life.

6) What NOW? (Keyword: Demonstration)

Let’s not make the mistake of helping students realize where they need to go, but not showing them how to get there. A great lesson ends with practical and specific actions steps that answer the question “What now?” Students should leave small group with a clear understanding of next steps.

Let’s never forget…we are not called to teach lessons, we are called to teach people. Let’s give our best as we prepare to teach God’s life-changing truth!

The 140:
We are not called to teach lessons; we are called to teach people.
Let’s give our best as we prepare to teach God’s life-changing truth!

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See what I did there?